Pumpkins, pumpkins, pumpkins

Long story short;  We went to the pumpkin patch, they didn't have very many good pumpkins left so we just went to the grocery store.  Kinley had a lot of fun at the pumpkin patch and was not such a whiney baby about carving the pumpkins like last year.

Here is a list of things Kinley had to say about her pumpkins (a.k.a. pump pumps) and her trip to the pumpkin patch:

I wuv pump pumps.

Dis one too small.

I not wike corn.

In response to my suggestion of walking through the hay maze, "I not wike hay".

While carving the pumpkins, "oh, pump pumps guts pretty" and "I not touch pump pump guts".

After Rich put the candles in the finished products, "I scared of that.  Pump pumps go outside".

And here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure.

I swear she isn't stoned.

This is Kinley's new smile.  Pretty isn't it?

Now, unrelated to pumpkins.  I am posting a little poll on my blog.  The question is, how does the world prefer my hair?  Basically, who thinks I should get to end my 2 year struggle with growing my hair out.  I mean, really, I think I succeeded.  It's longer than it has been since I was like 16 years old.  So, here's the question, should Marlyce wear her hair straight, curly, or get to chop it off short again?  Feel free to leave a comment, or maybe I'll put forth the effort to make an actual poll on the side.

Things I don't understand

Unfortunately for me, I am one of those people that analyzes everything and has a very strong need to figure things out.  So, when issues or situations arise that I just can't seem to understand, they weigh heavily on my mind and further increase my level of insanity, and honestly, I can't really afford for that level to get much higher.  In an effort to find some plausible solutions, I will post my questions/ventings here and feel free to offer your suggestions.

1.  Exactly how old is Mickey Mouse and his little Clubhouse friends?  I mean, clearly they are old enough to be living on their own and they drive.  However, if they are that old, why are they doing a show for pre-schoolers?  Seems creepy.

2.  Do Diego and Dora's parents know that they are off galavanting around the world saving animals in peril and having other such adventures?  I mean, I don't really even like Kinley to play in the basement by herself for too long, mostly because I know she is making a ginormous mess rather than helping an injured animal.  I am just waiting for the day when Kinley tries to jump in a space ship to go rescue some tiny little aliens and I have to say, "um, Kinley, you are too young to be going into outer space all by yourself."  And then she'll be like, "uh, mom, Dora does it all the time.  Get a grip."  What do I say to that???

3.  Why oh why do I continue to see hand gestures at the 4-way stop sign as a means of determining whose turn it is?  I mean, honestly, YIELD TO THE PERSON ON THE RIGHT!  It's not rocket science.  And roundabouts...don't even get me started.

4.  When a door is clearly labeled "enter" and the other door clearly labeled "exit", why are we still confused as to which door to use?  I know it's not really a big deal, but I'm a rule follower and I like organization and order.  I think this world already has enough chaos.

5.  I have seen numerous commercials or ads, if you will, of high fructose corn syrup defending itself.  First, I would like to know who exactly launched the attack against high fructose corn syrup, I mean geez high fructose corn syrup, a bit touchy are we?  Second, I would like to know if high fructose corn syrup thinks that its ads are winning people back, assuming they ever quit consuming the product.  I think comparing yourself to sugar, which we all know isn't so great for us, may not be your best move.  You should maybe discuss with your campaign adviser comparing yourself to something nutritional like vegetables or fruit.

Okay, thanks for listening, I'm done for today.

Funnies from a 2 year old

Now that Kinley is talking so much, it seems like pretty much everything out of her mouth is just hilarious.  Since this acts as my journal/scrapbook, it seems the appropriate place to write down a few of her latest.

After sprinting down the hall to find me in the kitchen, Kinley announces, "I not touch my poops".  I responded with, "have you been touching your poops up until now?  Because we might need to do some serious sanitizing today."

While we were getting ready to leave for Rich's hair cut, I asked Kinley if she wanted a hair cut.  She responded with, "no, not cut Kinley.  Kinley want candy corn."  Hmm, interesting, but I fail to see the connection between the two, and yes, she consistently refers to herself in the third person and has the same candy corn addiction that her mother has.

When discussing lunch options today, I asked if she wanted chicken nuggets and some peaches.  Kinley said, "I think," then placed her finger to her chin for a minute and added, "I do."

Currently, Kinley also enjoys faking the hiccups, scaring people, picnic lunches with her "friends", mooching gum balls from Rich's secretary, and has spent most of the morning trying to get her bear to say "cheese" for a picture.  I'm concerned we are raising a class clown, unintentionally of course.  

My little chicken

Some how my little fearless wonder has turned into the biggest chicken ever.  It all started about 3 weeks ago while we were in Sun Valley for the Idaho Association of the Defense Council conference (yes, one of Rich's boring functions).  My parents were nice enough to come along so that they could babysit while we went to dinners and other activities.  We all had the chance to go this wonderful little restaurant for lunch.  While eating, sweet little Grandma pointed out the absolutely gigantic bull that was mounted on the wall.  Well, Kinley ended up having, basically, a massive panic attack.  She is still talking about the daddy cow.

I was hoping it was just a short phase and decided to take Kinley to Green River to see family and go to the Homecoming game.  My nephew Keenan is a big time football star now and my niece Katie is a super cute cheerleader.  As we were walking into the football stadium, Kinley kept saying, "oh, wow mama".  However, once we were inside the stadium, her expression quickly changed to one of sheer terror.  Naturally we ended up sitting right by the band, which according to Kinley, plays "too loud".  Kinley was absolutely scared to death.  She had the worst death grip on me.  She kept saying, "I not like feetball".  It sure didn't help that Green River (my nephew's team) scored like 7 touchdowns in the first half, which of course meant the band was playing the fight song over and over.  And as a special treat, they were doing fireworks after the touchdowns.  Needless to say, Kinley is not a fan of fireworks.  She let me know, "I scared of pop pops". 

Luckily, Aunt Shawna came to help save the day.  All we needed was a bag of skittles, one beanie to cover her ears and eyes as needed, one super cute cousin Kolter, and one high school kid dressed up in a mascot costume, appropriately named by Kinley "Charlie Chukar the Wolf". I am proud to say that Green River won by a lot.  Keenan played an outstanding game, and Katie was by far the cutest cheerleader on the field.  The next day when we walked into the gym for the volleyball games (2 other nieces play for the middle school), Kinley, with terror in her eyes, announced "I not like feetball".  To which I said, good, because we're at a volleyball game. 

So long Charlie

This is a picture of Kinley with two of her best friends, her daddy, and Charlie.  Charlie is the mascot of the local double A baseball team here.  Kinley absolutely loves Charlie, she calls him "Charlie Chukar".  She spends the entire game yelling things like, "hi Charlie", "hey Charlie", "love you Charlie".  However, when she finally got the chance to meet Charlie, she was scared to death, as you can see in the picture.  She is actually saying "cheese", but she is more than hesitant to stand by Charlie.

Unfortunately, we had a similar experience with Mazy, our little dog.  Kinley really liked her at first and yelled at her to play all day long.  However, when Mazy would get close to, run near, or heaven forbid, touch Kinley, she would freak out.  One day Kinley was bugging Mazy and Mazy ran at Kinley and knocked her down, then later sort of bit at her fingers.  From that moment on, it was "I not like Mazy".  So, unfortunately, Mazy has had to find yet another home.  She is living with my cousin now, and I trust she is finding things to her liking.

So, with the end of baseball near, and the end of our time as pet owners, we say, so long Charlie...and Mazy too.

Kinley, Inc.

I began my employment with Kinley, Inc. nearly 3 years ago.  I began with a very nauseating, sickening, painful, 38 week internship before being promoted to the position of "mama".  I have been in my current position for 26 months now.  This current position certainly has its ups and downs, but overall, I really do love my job.  I must confess that I have the most demanding boss that I have ever had in my life, she is cute though, and one heck of a dancer.    

I don't mind that I work 24 hours a day with no breaks, or that I am always on-call.  I don't mind that I don't always get a full nights sleep, or that I clean up 50 messes a day.  I am even getting used to the tantrums, the time outs, the disciplining, however, the cuddling, snuggling, hugs, kisses, and even "I love you's" certainly make up for the downs.  What I cannot tolerate are days when my boss choses not to take a nap.  As if she wasn't enough of a handful before, now kick the "whinies" into high gear and juggle all the rest as well, it's a challenging day.

Today, my boss decided to forego nap time and that it was funny to call me "stinky" all day and she even added in a "cock-a-poo-poo" for good measure. I'm not sure what "cock-a-poo-poo" means, but it doesn't sound good.  Now, I can take all of the messes, whining, screaming, and disobedience.  What I cannot take are attacks on my personal hygiene, especially when she knows I took a shower today because she laid on the bathroom floor the entire time.  Not to mention, when repeatedly asked to quit calling mama stinky, she just laughed.  I find this to have led to a hostile and negative work environment.  Therefore, she leaves me no choice, I quit.

What's that?  You can't quit the position of "mama"?  Well, there's some fine print for you.  That's just fantastic.  In that case, I'm demanding a 15 minute break. 

***Note***
The author and her boss have since reconciled and have settled on taking the afternoon off for a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse marathon.