Dear Santa,
This is Kinley. My mommy and I went to see you at our local mall. Mommy explained that you can't be at all the malls in the world at the same time, so you have helpers. I would like to suggest that you take a look at your screening process cause our Santa wasn't a very good one. First of all, why do I have to pay a minimum of $12.99 to have my picture taken with your "helper"? Seems a bit pricey. But that is besides the points. My mommy and I were shopping and we saw where your "workshop" was set up, so we stopped to say hello. I was a bit nervous so I just stayed in my stroller, but I was kind of excited, and I really liked the nice lady taking pictures. My excitement quickly faded when I saw the helper Santa. Mommy said, "can you say hello to Santa?" I said, "You must be outta your mind. This isn't Santa. This is some skinny, middle aged man wearing a dirty, red velvet suit, and an awfully nasty wig and beard (and his black hair was showing)." And I didn't look at him after that, and I didn't even want his stupid candy cane. I just thought you should know that somebody in your office let this guy slip through the cracks. I saw a better looking Santa grocery shopping (not in his suit of course) at Wal-Mart the other day. I'll keep looking for a good looking Santa so I can sit on his lap and tell him what I want for Christmas. By the way, thank you for all the good stuff you brought me last year.
Oh, and one last thing. My mommy is always saying that if I am naughty, you won't come to my house. Well, I have been naughty lately, but I would like to state my case and plead not guilty by reason of mental defect caused by teething. I can't help it, I got 2 molars over the last few weeks and it makes me act like a little monster. So, please take that into consideration when checking your list twice. And when my mommy tells me to quit doing things, like pushing the t.v. buttons, hitting, pinching, licking my daddy's shoes, and all the other stuff she tells me not to do, I am going to try really hard to stop doing them...without a tantrum.
Merry Christmas Santa and have a good flight!
Kinley
6 comments:
Hilarious!!! We really miss Kinley. She has so much personality now. I'm sure she and Haden could have lots of fun together! I'm wondering, since she is licking Rich's shoes, if you have sanitized them like you did Kinley's at the health dept.?
LOL!! Your posts are always so entertaining! Thanks for the good laugh! Where was that at? In IF? Well cant wait to see you guys!
lol that's hilarous!!!
I love it. We have seen a few sad looking Santa's too. At Walmart last week they kept saying,"And Santa is here you can see him by the food department." We couldn't understand why they kept announcing it...until we saw Santa. Frightening.
Very funny, Marlyce! I didn't even try to introduce Pearl to Santa at the ward Christmas party. She doesn't even sit on grandparents' laps yet.
That is so funny! You know that is probably what these little kids are really thinking! I love it.
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